I'm a Domme and my sub has been with me for two years. He's started asking for more and more extreme things and I'm not sure if I want to go there. How do I hold a line as a Dominant?

A persistent pattern in long-term D/s is 'sub-creep' or escalation: over time, a submissive's baseline shifts and what once felt intense begins to feel ordinary, leading to requests for more extreme experiences. This is a real dynamic, it is not a character flaw in your sub, but it is also not a mandate.

Dominants have their own desires, limits, and comfort zones, and these are as valid as the submissive's. The structure of a D/s relationship does not obligate you to fulfill every request; it gives you the authority to decide what the dynamic includes. A Dominant who pushes past their own comfort limits to satisfy a sub's escalating requests is neither sustainable nor ethical.

The conversation worth having is a clear and warm but firm one: explaining that your limits exist and that the dynamic operates within them, not in spite of them. Many submissives, when this is said directly, respond with relief rather than resistance. They may have been escalating partly out of a misdirected sense that they needed to work harder to get your engagement, and clarity about where you stand often resolves that.

If your sub's interests have genuinely moved to territory you have no interest in, and that gap feels permanent, it is worth having an honest conversation about compatibility. Not every D/s relationship can absorb an unlimited escalation in one partner's interests, and recognising a compatibility limit is not a failure.

You do not owe anyone access to experiences you do not want to provide.